Outtakes

A story I forgot to tell from Glacier National Park. My third morning there, I kept hearing a thwack! Like someone was tossing an axe into a tree stump. It woke me up, and once up, I was too stiff to go back to bed. Who the hell is doing this at 6 in the morning? (Maybe 6:30. It wasn’t late.) And repeatedly! What a jerk! Having crawled out of my tent, I started following the noise, but couldn’t see anyone. Then I saw something ping off the top of the RV in the next spot over. Squirrels! Squirrels pulling pine cones and throwing them down to the ground… bouncing them off the RV.

Talking to a ranger at Yellowstone about the folks approaching buffalo to take a picture: “Practicing a little recreational Darwinism, are we?’

Ron Paul. The more rural you are, the more “Ron Paul for president” signs you will see. Does anyone out here realize he’s out of the race?

Beer Pop Bait Gas. 14 years ago, my friend Mark sent me a tape entitled Beer Pop Bait Gas after the road signs you’d see for gas stations on the more rural highways. Nowadays, I’d say it’d be Gas Bait Wi-fi Espresso. Times change.

The wi-fi bit is truly astonishing. There’s networks everywhere. Everywhere except National Parks, I should say. Otherwise, I never had a problem getting a hook-up. Even in Ennis, MT!