Anne-Marie just did what?

I went to a chaplaincy training. I can imagine most folks who know me are thinking, "wtf? Anne-Marie got religion? Hell froze over?"

Yeah, yeah, Unitarian Chaplaincy Training. Get a grip.

Basically, chaplaincy training teaches peer counseling skills - active listening, mirroring, helping the person find their own answer to dealing with a situation. Helping your peer out enough to get them to the help they need, or until they solve their own problem.

There were 24ish youth and 6 adults (the numbers kept magically changing, even when we were all in the room - somewhere between 28 and 32) who attended, plus our two lovely trainers, Annelise and Samaya (one youth, one adult). This is, actually, a BIG group of people to be at such a training. It was in Vancouver, B.C., one of my favorite towns, at the Unitarian Church of Vancouver.

For me personally, these are some skills I really want to work on... asking questions rather than giving advice, actively listening, etc. I'm good at establishing rapport but that usually involves bringing it back to myself, which isn't too useful. There were multiple levels of reasons for why I wanted to attend the training.

It was good, in so many ways... the 30 people made it like a mini-con, but without all the headaches. The kids were mostly on their own, behavior-wise... shoot, if you can't behave yourself at a chaplain training, where can you behave yourself? The smaller numbers also meant I got to know some of the kids much better and learn a bit more about them. That was cool. Given the smaller numbers, the kids interacted with us a lot more too. I always felt included, which is a good feeling.

One of my favorite exercises that we do is a Car Wash. We don't know why it's called that. The idea is your name is at the top of the paper, and other people write nice comments to you. Last night, it was modified slightly to say, "Anne-Marie, you are..." and they were supposed to finished the sentence in 1-3 words. Many people broke that. But it allowed the sheets to keep moving and stay brief. I'm often surprised by what people write, but also really affirmed by the things they say about me. It's not an easy role or an easy relationship, so when we can bridge that gap, it's very rewarding.

We had a strong community, and we had good, strong energy all the way through (that's unusual). I want to share a prayer invoked at this conference that was written by one of the youth, Eli Johnston, 3 years ago at one of our other conferences:

* It is often only when spinning in to infinity that one can see self: me; a sparkling spinning nova
* Shifting burning energy
* And then ask, confounded by the radiance of being
* What is it for us to do?
* What will I do with my gifts?
* What will I do with this one wild and precious life?
* In the unfathomable distance of blinding fire that we call a star
* With the immutable force of water, and in the lucid pressure of air, in the ties that bind us to this earth
* Find yourself - your limitless and eternal self, and choose to bless the world.

We've since adopted this in to our culture, in shorthand:

What is it for us to do?
It is for us to heal the world!

Watch out for these youth - they know no limits.

Today we went to church with the congregation. As a thank-you to the congregation, last night we made hearts and put them into the hymnals on the page of the first hymn we sang today. It was so fabulous to see people open to the page, see the heart, and then smile at us. It made us feel really good, and it was really cool.

Afterward, they were having a "soup lunch," and we were able to go to. I had lentil soup... yummm.... so good.

I gave a ride home to one of our youth, a guy named Caleb. We got to the border okay, but - blech! - a 90 minute wait. We had a really good conversation in the meantime, wandering all over religion and life and back. We finally approached the border. Border guard walks up, "You guys both have passports? Just the two of you? Okay, you can go in the NEXUS lane." The NEXUS lane is normally for regular commuters who have gotten a pre-approved pass, so they just show their badge and keep going. Caleb and I move over into this line, pull up to the guard. He looks at both our passports, says, "Where are you from?" I say, "He's from Seattle, and I'm from Bonney Lake." Guard: "Why were you in Canada?" "Unitarian Church Conference." Guard: "Have a nice day."

Mind you, I'm sitting there with an apple in my hand, ready to declare it and let them take it. We pretty much established I'm not Caleb's mother (he's underage), and they don't even inquire why I'm with him. As we're driving away, Caleb quips, "I guess profiling works!" Coupla white people, move along...



I'm now pretty toasted and about to head for bed... to read, and soon to sleep... but I love youth energy. I really love doing this work. And I'm really, really, really glad I went and did this training.

Chocolate & Boys

Yesterday was the first annual Enumclaw Chocolate (& Wine) festival. I went with Nate & Charles - always happy to go food hunting - and Charles hits the first tables of chocolate samples in about 0.6 seconds. As I walk up behind him (there was quite a crowd), the lady says, "Oh, is this your.... special friend?" Nate walks up behind me and I say, "Yeah, this is my friend, too." It seemed a weird comment in the first place; but yes, a smart-ass reply. Booth #2 had gingerbread truffles dipped in white chocolate (Charles bought some). We hit a cookie place, chocolate fountains, Intrigue Truffles (I bought some there)... and that was most of the pure chocolate places. There were other booths, but stuff like smoked salmon (which I also got) and landscaping services. And Franciscan Health. That booth wasn't very busy; it's hard to go talk about your health when you're busy with chocolate and booze.

So, on to the wine garden. Charles & Nate are big sweet wine fans - even more than I am. You get two tickets with your entry fee, and thereafter you have to buy them. The first winery we hit is Rockridge, located in Enumclaw, which does fruity wines. I try the tayberry, mainly because I've never tried a tayberry (a raspberry/blackberry cross from Scotland). When I look at their brochure, I notice they advertise themselves for hard cider, and.... oh baby.... mead. Ahhhh. A new meadery!! This is good. The mead won't be ready until July or August, but I'm very happy. I'm chatting with the lady about her cider and she says, "I've got it under the table, but I can't sell it here." And the reason you're not pouring it for me is what??? I'm quite excited and will have to go visit. This is wonderful!

We try a few other wineries - Knipprath, Eaton Hill, Kalamar (in Lake Tapps!) and one more before we're out of tickets. We cruise around for some purchases, then head back to my house to make dinner. I really don't drink much these days, but for some inexplicable reason I wound up buying some flavored vodkas on Friday night - an infused blood orange vodka with mango and passionfruit, and then a pear vodka. The pear vodka had quite an edge to it, so I figured it needed to be mixed. We picked up some ginger ale, which went really well with the pear. Happy campers we were for the rest of the evening...

Interlaced with the wine & chocolate adventure was my first "match" who had actually emailed me back! As I've mentioned before, I'm trying to keep an open mind. I figure if eharmony matches me up with someone, there's a reason, I may as well chat with someone and see what it is. Okay, the 5'2" guy was a no-go, but generally speaking, I've started down the communication path. But this guy, John from Portland, was the first guy that when I looked at his profile I thought, "oooh! This could be good!" He's 6'3", a cyclist, and seemed to have a pretty strong wit and for last book read talked about "Surely you're joking, Mr. Feynman!" which is Richard Feynman's autobiography and actually a really, really good book.

So, I was pretty excited when he sent me some answers to my questions and asked some questions in return. I had finished them about the time Nate and Charles showed up. We went off to the festival, and when we got back we watched a video I'd told them about. The next step is trading your "can't stands" and "must haves", e.g. your deal-breakers. I looked through his and thought, okay... I didn't see anything in them I fail miserably at. I was also pleased he mentioned stuff about being neat and clean. I sent mine along and went back to the party. After Nate & Charles left, I checked in... that bastard closed the match!! Ah well. I wonder which of the deal-breakers didn't work for him....

I set my profile up a long time ago - probably close to 2 years at this point - I just hadn't actually waded back into the pool until now. I have kept it updated, or at least considered that it's still true for me. Looking at my must haves/can't stand, however, I did notice some of it seems pretty much a reaction of things I didn't like in Allen. I don't think it's inaccurate, but I do think I should look at it from a more me-centric point of view and see if I'd give the same answers

The entertainment rolls on...